“BECAUSE I’LL CUT YOUR FUCKING THROAT! That’s why.”
I decided today that i didn’t care to wear my usual “butch” clothing. I just didn’t want to. I felt the need to get up, put some spandex pants on and go for a jog with my mom. You drove by in your red pickup and marked us an easy target. “Whooo!” Words of sheer genious, i tell you.
That night i wanted to go out. I have no idea how long it took me to shave, put on some makeup, and pull that miniskirt over my ass. Since this isn’t a regular ritual, it took me some time. I paid meticulous attention to every detail. Every stroke of eyeliner was a meditative breath reflecting who i am. But of those countless minutes, i can assure you that not one was spent for you. Yet still, on a dark street corner i stand with a friend, going out of our way so that your path does not cross ours. But that’s not good enough. You drop bombs on peaceful territories. Tonight, you lob a hand grenade across the street, “you ladies need a ride?” You snicker with your friends. You’ve proven your worthy of adorning your penis. If we needed a ride, asshole, we would have driven. And i probably wouldn’t have worn sneakers. But i say nothing. My friend and i link arms, look forward and hope to disappear in shadows.
But i wasn’t silent. I whispered to myself, “i wouldn’t ask such loaded questions if i were you.” In hopes that you would hear my faint voice. In hopes that you would ask me why. Why?
[tags]The Blank Noise Project blogathon, harrassment, sexism[/tags]